Skip to main content

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road

This funny!
enjoy and like my friends says "this is purely humor, if it offends you....man see Dr. Phill coz Oprah wouldnt even be able to help you"

Subject: QUESTION: WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

QUESTION: WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

* KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

* PLATO: For the greater good.

* ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

* KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

* RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

* CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

* MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR: ... I envision a world where all chickens will be
free to cross roads without having their motives being called into question.

* MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares
why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

* JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?"

* FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the
road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

* SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were
justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

* GEORGE W. BUSH (2): We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

* MOHAMMED ALDOURI: (Iraqi Ambassador): The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.

* OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we
overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

* DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

* EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

* BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

* ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die on the rain.

* ISAAC NEWTON: Any chicken in the universe shall always cross a road
perpendicularly to the side of the road, and in an infinitely long straight
line at uniform speed, unless the chicken stops due to an unbalanced
reactive force in the opposite direction of the chicken's motion

* NELSON MANDELA: Never again, will the chicken be questioned for crossing
the road. This is an ideal for which I am prepared to die.

* THABO MBEKI: We need to establish if really there is a connection between
the chicken and the road.

* ROBERT MUGABE: For all of these years the road has been owned by the white farmers, the poor underprivileged chicken has waited too long for that road to be given to him and now he is crossing it in force with his fellow war
veteran chickens. We intend taking over this road and giving it to the roadless chickens so that they can cross it without fear of retribution from
Britain who promised money to institute road reform. We will not stop until
all roadless chickens have roads to cross and the freedom to cross them.

And the for Kenyans in the house and my buddies who can understand the language.....................

RAILA ODINGA: Had the chicken signed an MOU not to cross the road?
Crossing the road is a two horse affair. Anything else is a donkey!!!
Besides no one can stop the river Nile....... But if we cross the road like i've done seven times so far, then we can invite the chicken to come back to the original side of the road....

KALONZO MUSYOKA: It is another miracle in my march to State House. I am telling you my brothers and sisters the chicken wave is unstoppable...........

PASTOR PIUS MUIRU: Na kuku itaendelea..................

STANLEY N MATIBA: Let the other chicken decide.....

*EMILIO MWAI KIBAKI: Kuku ilivuka pale pale, ikienda huko huko........na
hilo ndilo jambo la muhimu.......hakuna mambo ingine,......... na hatuwezi
kataa, tutakataa namna gani ? Hakunaaa !!! Na hao wanaendelea kuongea mambo ya kuku..................ni wapumbavu.................mavi ya kuku!!!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Alchemist - Amazing "To Realize One's Destiny is a Person's Only Obligation"

My good friend Ekeh popularly known as "THE CHAIRMAN" is a big fun of the Alchemist and he recommended this book for a read. On September 21st 2008 on my way back from Minneapolis,at Minneapolis/St. Paul International Airport, I happen to miss my flight which was departing at 4:45pm CST, even though I was in the airport 30 minutes before departure. I was definitely upset but since I was with a good friend and the great time we had together I tried to control myself and paid without question a fee that allows me to be put on standby list; usually uncharacteristic of me to just agree without speaking my mind. so I saw my good friend off their flight to MILWAUKEE and then I came back to wait for my standby flight 3 hrs later from my initial flight. I Had just finished reading another book "How to win friends & Influence people" - actually this book had some influence on my way of reacting to the situation than I usually will i.e. not argue especially since I was t
5 comments
Read more

The Bottom Billion

The Bottom Billion By Paul Collier, A Professor of Economics at Oxford University is a very elaborate piece of work that clearly nails down the issues that drags the economies of the developing world and in particular “the bottom million” economies. You may be wondering what the “bottom billion” is, it simply refers to countries whose their economies has stagnated for the last 40 years and they account of one-sixth of the world population. As you may be aware that our world has a population of 6 billion people. If you care about poverty in the world this one is a must read book. Professor Collier lays down the main hindrances to economic growth in the countries of the bottom billion as he refers to them as traps and I will list them here: 1. The Conflict Trap – he explains that all societies have conflict, but they can trap a country in poverty. - I agree with Professor Collier that Civil war is costly and so is a coup d’état, very challenging to recover from especially if a country e
3 comments
Read more

MY HEART BLEEDS FOR MY COUNTRY KENYA

Am lost and without words, i can't fathom the post-election mayhem that was just witnessed in my lovely Country Kenya. I pray that God will heal the broken hearts for all those who lost their loved ones, which is really Kenya as a country has lost beloved ones in this ugly scene, the darkest week in the history of our country since Independence. God help Kenya. who is to blame for all these lives lost? this is the big question, could it be President Kibaki of PNU or could it be Mr. Raila Odinga of ODM? For sure, i don't care whether president Kibaki rigged the election, which of course seems to be backed by all evidences. However, though if Raila was a true democrat I will have expected him and other ODM leaders to have moved quickly to try and speak to their supporters to end the skirmishes. However, either willfully or not ODM leaders failed to move in to stop the Killing, this is not to imply that they in sighted their supporters, NO. My statement here is that as true democ
3 comments
Read more